breathing

echoing fissure of life
leaves me breath
less
so many things
stopping rarely for rest
bringing me back to the wonder of my fearful best
and yet strong luminous midnight star
i can only look into the past
(like a print of my son's hand on the frost windshield)
And that’s the mystery of this beating heart and the constant rise and fall
Drawing in breath after breath since 1963
And it is quiet
deep inside me
soul stinging
making picturesque piroets
God as farmer
circles of new soil
Where green kisses sudden unusual appearance
and there upon all miracles
(though smaller than the hem of His train
I am
lost inside the maelstrom of deed and transgression
found within the portals of grace
O please let me cling to you
Much weaker than Magdalene
still
wanting to hang on to You
holdng
seeking
praying
begging
weepng
not knowing
but somehow
believing